


First Steps

by Baby_babushka



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Declarations Of Love, Depressive Thoughts, F/M, Fix-It, Fluff, M/M, PTSD, Physical Therapy, Post-TRoS, Smut, soft, traumatic injuries, will add more tags
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-25
Updated: 2020-09-25
Packaged: 2021-03-08 05:00:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26639971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Baby_babushka/pseuds/Baby_babushka
Summary: Post-TROS fix-it fic.TW: extreme bodily injuryBen and Rey barely make it off Exogol alive, and Ben faces a new challenge brought on by the final battle, while finding home and family along the way.
Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 10
Kudos: 71





	First Steps

The ground was rough and cold beneath Ben’s hands. Pain bloomed through his body, and his arms shook in their struggle to right himself. Stumbling, he grabbed onto the jagged wall of the abyss he had been flung into. 

Something was wrong. His body felt weak and cold, like something had been knocked out of place. His legs were trembling, with something more than pain and exhaustion. But he couldn’t sit and examine himself. He had to get to Rey.

_Rey._

He couldn’t feel her in the Force. Where their bond once was, there was a chasm. She was in trouble, perhaps in too deep for him to help. He could no longer sense the Emperor, and the cavern was deathly silent.

Steeling himself, he climbed.

The sharp stones cut into his palms, grated through his shirt, and the trudge upwards wasn’t helped by the errant twitching and spasming of his legs. Out of breath and out of time, Ben finally reached the edge.

Pulling himself up, his heart turned cold at the sigh of Rey, _his Rey_ , crumpled on the ground across the cave. Tears streamed down his face as he stumbled, crawled to her, when his body was giving up.

He reached her, and her skin was as cold as the stone around them. He gently maneuvered her into his lap. Her limp form sagged in his arms, and Ben had to hold back his grief. She was still beautiful even in death, and he could only pull her corpse close, wishing that she could hold him back. 

The emptiness of the bond ached fiercely, and he knew what he had to do. He had his time, but he wanted to give hers back. The galaxy didn’t need him anymore, but it needed her. The thought was dark and swirling in his head, and a remorse so deep expanded in his chest. He could do this one thing right. Even if it was the only thing. 

Taking a rattling breath, he set a hand on her waist, and the sight of it ripped a sob out of him. How he wished to have more time with her, to properly hold her, in peace and comfort, not this. Never this.

He reached out, towards the darkness where their bond once was, searching for any sign of her light. It was fading quickly, speeding ahead of him. Reaching as far and as strongly as he could, he finally grasped it, her. Her light sang through him and with a heavy heart, he started to pull her back to him.

Ben found strength that he never could find before, pulling her further and further out of the darkness. Her light grew blinding, and his strength waned. He gave everything he had, and had nothing left. He sagged, hoping his efforts weren’t for nothing. Just as he thought he couldn’t have done it-

Her hand, now warm, rested over his. Ben gasped, meeting her eyes that fluttered awake and bright. Rey sat up, looking at him.

Stars, she was alive. A sob burst out of him, but he dared not embrace her, too afraid and too weak. 

“Ben,” she smiled. His heart was slowing, he was shaking, but the way she looked at him. Maybe she felt it too.

Her hands on his cheeks, she leaned forward and kissed him. He met her lips without hesitation, wrapping his arms around her. It was perfect. She was warm, but not warm enough to chase away the coldness that was growing in him.

She pulled away, looking as lost and hopeful as he, and he chuckled disbelievingly with a small smile. But his smile faltered.

The effort catching up to him, he shuddered and fell back to the cold ground he had emerged from.

* * *

“Ben!” Rey cried, trying to ease Ben’s fall to the ground. His face was pale and drawn, and his life force was weak. “Ben, please,” she sobbed. She couldn’t lose him now, just when he brought her back. The universe could not be so cruel. “Please!” She cried out, hoping anyone could hear. And then the tremors started. Ben’s whole body was shaking, growing and growing into convulsions. She tried to steady him, but she couldn’t, she was too weak, she was alone.

She could feel him fading, falling into the darkness of death she had just escaped from, when she felt-

“Leia,” she gasped, looking up to see the late General crouched above her son, bathing him in a blue glow. 

“It’s not his time,” she said, meeting Rey’s eyes. “He’s as foolish and hopeful as his father,” she smiled, before reaching her two frail hands to Ben’s temples. The convulsions subsided, and some of his color returned to his face. “I can’t bring him back, but I can stabilize him. Lando and Chewie should be nearby in the Falcon, comm them and they will come help.”

“Leia-“ Rey choked. “Thank you.”

“You can thank me later. Comm them now,” Leia commanded.

Rey had never been so relieved to hear Chewie’s voice, to see the Millenium Falcon land nearby. Turning back to Ben, Leia’s form faded. Rey rushed over to help get his body up, when Chewie emerged from the ramp. She saw the pain twist on his face, could hear the grief in his howl. He quickly lifted Ben and got him onto the ship, barely closing the hatch before they were leaving Exogol.

Chewie helped her get Ben settled on the Dejarik couch, and helped her find medical supplies to stabilize him. Chewie returned to the helm as the atmosphere rocked the ship. Rey nodded her thanks before turning her attention to Ben.

He had started shaking again, and she tried to steady his unconscious body as she put an oxygen mask over his nose and mouth. The oxygen helped some, but he was still struggling.

She crouched over him, wrapping her arms around him as best she could, trying to ease him through the bond. His mind was both empty and tumultuous, wracked by tremors, numbness, and pain. 

“You’re okay, we’ve got you,” she whispered, tears collecting in her eyes. “I won’t let you go, Ben. I won’t.”

The ship steadied as it leapt to hyperspace. Rey sighed, relieved to be away from that cursed planet.

Now that they were on their way to safety, she felt the pain and exhaustion that she had ignored after awakening. Just as she was nodding off next to Ben, she felt someone approach.

“Ben,” Lando whispered, leaning against the back of the couch. His eyes were so bright and so sad, but hopeful all the same. He heaved a breath. “Glad you’re with us, Little Starfighter,” he remarked thoughtfully, patting Ben’s head affectionately.

Rey could only watch the tenderness unfold.

“You take care of him, alright?” Lando asked Rey. “He’s something special.” Both Rey and Lando smiled as she nodded, her gaze wandering back to Ben.

Lando left to return to the cockpit before Rey could notice. 

“We’re coming into orbit of Alan Kloss!” She heard a familiar voice call through the hall. She smiled as Finn entered the common area with Jannah.

Finn’s face fell as he saw who she was alongside. 

* * *

“Why is he here?!” Finn exclaimed, reaching for the blaster on his hip. Without thinking, Rey reached out and halted his movement gently. He looked stricken, but Jannah touched his shoulder. 

“I don’t think there’s any harmful intent, Finn,” Jannah told Finn.

“Rey-“ Finn started. “Why, what is _he_ doing here?”

Rey paused to consider her words wisely. If she got this wrong, their friendship could fall apart.

“He came to help me defeat Palpatine. He…” she glanced at Ben. “He saved me.”

Finn bristled, but stepped forward.

“Why did he do that?” Finn asked. Jannah didn’t seem as confused as Finn, and kept looking at Ben and Rey. She sensed that Jannah could see the connection between them. “Why would he want to help you?”

Rey sighed.

“We have a connection. I can’t really explain it, but we understand each other. He saved me on the Supremacy by killing Snoke,” Rey said.

“You said that _you_ killed him, and the First Order did, too,” Finn replied, looking confused still. “They put a bounty on you, _he_ put a bounty on you,” he gestured towards an unconscious Ben. 

“It’s complicated, I’ll have to explain it later,” Rey responded, feeling the ship come out of hyperspace. Finn nodded, heading to the cockpit as they docked. Jannah stayed with Rey as they entered the hangar of the medical frigate orbiting Ajan Kloss.

“I’ll help you get him onboard,” Jannah offered. Rey nodded her thanks as they propped Ben up together and made their way down the ramp.

They were met with an emergency medical team ready with a stretcher, and they assisted Rey and Jannah in transferring his limp body to the stretcher. Rey’s stomach churned as she saw his blood streaking the cloth covering the stretcher. She bit back tears as the team did their work, starting an IV immediately with a bacta solution. They began rushing away, when Finn called for her from the Falcon.

Rey saw him coming down the ramp, then looked back as Ben was being wheeled to the emergency med bay. She couldn’t stop her face from twisting with pain and conflict, when she chose to follow Ben.

She made her choice.

* * *

Artwork by me, @emilyredekerart


End file.
